200 Bagel Puns That Will Leave You Hole-Heartedly Laughing

Bagels are not only delicious, but they also have a hole lot of pun-tential when it comes to wordplay. Whether you love them with cream cheese, smoked salmon, or simply toasted with butter, bagels bring joy — and apparently, a whole buffet of belly laughs. If you’re in the mood for a hole-some laugh, look no further. We’ve rounded up 200 of the best, most creative, and laugh-out-loud funny bagel puns you’ve ever seen. They’re perfect for social captions, birthday cards, food blogs, or simply satisfying your inner punster.

Let’s roll into this bagelicious list and get toasted on humor!

Top 200 Bagel Puns

Bagel Love Puns

You’ve got a hole in my heart.
I’m bagel-ing for your love.
You’re my everything… just like my favorite bagel.
I’m loxed in love with you.
We were baked for each other.
Don’t go gluten my heart.
You make my heart go round.
You’re my schmear-mate.
You bagel-ieve in love at first bite?
You make my heart rise like dough.

Bagel Friendship Puns

You’re a hole lot of fun.
You’re my butter half.
You’re the cream cheese to my bagel.
Let’s stick together like lox and schmear.
Friends forever, through thick and thin.
You’re everything I knead.
I dough-n’t know what I’d do without you.
We’re a toasted duo.
I can’t bagel-ieve how lucky I am to have a friend like you.
You always fill the void in my life.

Foodie Bagel Puns

I’m feeling grate… maybe it’s the cheddar bagel.
I’m on a roll — a bagel roll!
Don’t worry, brie happy… and eat a bagel.
Life’s better with a schmear.
That bagel was un-bread-ably good.
Toasting to good vibes and warm bagels.
I’m getting bready for the weekend.
That’s how I roll.
Hole-y guacamole, that’s good!
Let’s get toasty.

Romantic Bagel Puns for Couples

You make my world go round.
Bagel me crazy.
You baked me happy.
I’m falling for you, crust me.
I’ll never dessert you — unless it’s a bagel with Nutella.
Our love is cheddar than the rest.
Life without you is just a hollow bagel.
Our love is well-done, like a toasted bagel.
You’re my bagel bae.
I love you a lox.

Bagel vibes only.
Just a girl standing in front of a bagel, asking it to love her.
What a hole-some morning!
Rise and schmear.
Don’t be jalapeño business!
I’m going round in circles for this bagel.
Cream cheese dreams.
Too much bagel-tivity this morning.
Sorry I’m late — my bagel needed me.
Mondays are for bagels and coffee.

Workplace and Productivity Bagel Puns

Let’s spread some good vibes at the office.
Fueling up on bagels and ambition.
Bagel me up, Scotty — I’m ready for work.
Work hard, schmear harder.
Hole-d on, coffee and bagel first.
Nothing a good bagel can’t fix.
Cream cheese and spreadsheets — the perfect combo.
Bagels make meetings bearable.
That’s one toasty deal!
Give me bagels or give me… more bagels.

Animal-Themed Bagel Puns

Bagel + Beagle = Bagle.
That cat’s got a hole-y attitude.
I’m not lion, I love bagels.
You otter try this bagel.
It’s a paw-sitive bagel day.
Bear with me while I eat this bagel.
I’m ravenous for bagels.
This bagel’s got some serious bark!
You moo-ve me… just like this cream cheese.
Don’t quack with my bagel time.

Holiday-Themed Bagel Puns

Have a hole-y Christmas!
Bagel bells, bagel bells, bagel all the way.
Hoppy Easter — enjoy an egg bagel!
Let freedom ring — like a bagel!
New Year, new bagels.
You make my heart Valen-toast.
Bagel or treat?
I witch you a toasty Halloween.
It’s the schmear-iest time of the year.
Let’s roll into 2025 with carbs.

Pun-derful Bagel Sayings

You’re the hole package.
What a knead-ful day.
In crust we trust.
That bagel is on a roll!
You’re bagel-solutely amazing.
Keep calm and toast on.
Everything will be okay — just like my favorite bagel.
Love you from my head to-ma-toes… on a bagel.
Stop loafing around.
You’re jam-packed with awesomeness!

Lazy Day Bagel Puns

Just here for the carbs.
Couch, TV, and a warm bagel. Perfect Sunday.
Crumb-ing to the call of carbs.
I dough-n’t feel like doing anything.
The bagel life chose me.
It’s a bagel-and-Netflix kind of day.
Can’t schmear my joy right now.
That was a hole-hearted nap.
Rise, shine, and toast it.
Bagels: the official breakfast of lazy champions.

Even More Bagel Puns to Enjoy

You bagel my day.
Toast to love and bagels.
I knead a vacation and a bagel.
Bagel time is the best time.
Your bagel game is strong.
I can’t stop carb-loading on this.
I’m loaf-ing it.
That’s some hole-some content.
Carbs before concerns.
Yeast you can do is enjoy it.

Bagel Business and Café Humor

Bagel shop = happy place.
Dough you want cream cheese with that?
Our bagels are batter than the rest.
This place is un-bread-ably good.
We put the roll in rock and roll.
Don’t bagel on empty!
Baked fresh daily — we rise for the occasion.
Bagels so good they’ll make you hole-y.
Come for the coffee, stay for the bagels.
Toasted to perfection!

Cheesy Bagel Jokes

Why did the bagel break up with the cream cheese? It was getting too spread out.
What’s a bagel’s favorite sport? Dough-geball!
What do you call a sad bagel? A hole in despair.
What do bagels say when they propose? “You complete me.”
Why don’t bagels tell secrets? Because they’re full of holes.
What’s a bagel’s favorite movie? The Lord of the Rings.
What do you get when you cross a bagel with a comedian? A roll-ing joke!
Why did the bagel get promoted? It rose to the occasion.
What’s a bagel’s favorite instrument? The roll-ing drum.
Why was the bagel so smart? It had a well-rounded education.

Cute & Short Bagel Puns (For Captions or Cards)

Hole lotta love.
You butter believe it.
Brew and bagel — yes please.
Toasted and terrific.
Bagelicious mornings.
Just rolling with it.
Schmear happiness.
All you knead is love.
Bagels: love at first bite.
Keep it crusty.

Final 60 Bagel Puns to Make Your Day

You can’t handle this bread-th of flavor.
Who needs a boyfriend when you have bagels?
I don’t care what they say — bagels are bae.
Every bite is a hole-y experience.
Bagels are always the highlight of brunch.
What did the bagel say after meditating? “I’m centered.”
No drama, just toasty vibes.
I live that carb life.
Don’t go baking my heart.
You’re as warm as my morning bagel.
I’ve bagel-ed up my emotions.
Feeling hole-heartedly joyful.
One bite and I’m in crust.
My relationship status? In love with bagels.
If bagels were a language, I’d be fluent.
Nothing cheddar than this.
Rye not eat more bagels?
This bagel has me feeling loaf-struck.
I’m not crying — my bagel’s just too good.
Everything is better with everything bagels.
A day without bagels is un-bread-able.
Morning mantra: Eat. Bagel. Repeat.
Wake up and smell the toasted goodness.
I’d never bagel-stab you.
Let’s get carb-ed up!
You’ve got me on a roll.
Keep rolling with the dough.
Bagel before bros.
Brunch goals = bagel + coffee.
That bagel was dough-lightful!
Bagel puns never go stale.
Start the day hole-heartedly.
My diet plan? A hole lot of bagels.
Some see a bagel — I see a work of art.
This bagel is my jam.
I could bagel all day.
This is how I roll on weekends.
Wheat love bagels.
Feeling crumby without my bagel.
I have a burning passion for toasted bagels.
That bagel gave me inner peace.
Let’s toast to carb satisfaction.
A bagel a day keeps the grumps away.
I’m in my bagel era.
This is bread and butter.
Don’t be glazed and confused.
Hole up — that was tasty.
This bagel deserves a round of applause.
Toasty and proud.
Just dough it!
Bagels: the ring of deliciousness.
Let’s get this bread… in a circle.
Morning mood: extra schmear.
All I knead is carbs and love.
Bagel time is the best time.
I’m cereal-ously craving bagels.
Life’s a circle — like a bagel.
I feel wholesome after this bagel.
You’re the one I chews.
Never underestimate the power of a good bagel pun!

Final Thoughts

Whether you’re a bagel aficionado or just someone who appreciates good wordplay, this list of 200 bagel puns is sure to bring a smile to your face and a rumble to your belly. Use them for social captions, punny gift tags, bakery marketing, or just to sprinkle a little joy into someone’s day. And remember — life’s butter when you’re laughing over a warm bagel.

If you loved these, go ahead and share them with your fellow bagel-lovers. Because when it comes to bagel puns, there’s no such thing as too much schmear.

Also read 🐵 200 Monkey Puns That Will Drive You Bananas!

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